COPING WITH TRAGEDY

“Hate. It has caused a lot of problems in the world, but it has not solved a one yet” -Maya Angelou

There’s a lot of madness going on around the world, our country, and sometimes even our own backyards. It can be a tough pill to swallow, and even more difficult to have conversations about tragic events to young children. In light of recent events, here are some ideas on coping with events and teaching our children to do the same.

For many people, being proactive is an important part of making sense of and overcoming tragedy. Rather than staying stuck in the past, or the problem, becoming proactive helps you look for a solution and focus on the things you can change. It also forces you out of your own head, which is important to tap into but is easy to get stuck in during periods of grieving. Volunteering or reaching out to others are great ways to do this.

It’s okay to grieve. While there’s certainly something to be said for “going through the motions,” bottling your emotions hinders your recovery process from a tragic event. Feel what you need to feel, without judgement. If you have kids, allowing yourself to do this encourages them to grieve as well. Another important part of the process is allowing others to help you if you need it. Many of us feel the need to shoulder our burdens and grief, isolating them for fear that they will spread and contaminate the lives of others. It’s a normal fear, but unnecessary. If these people were struggling, you would want to help them in some way- so let them help you if they offer.

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’ To this day, especially in times of disaster, I remember my mother’s words and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers-so many caring people in this world” (Fred Rogers). Remember that for all the grief and terrible events that occur, both isolated and everyday, that there are good people in the world who are willing to help. That’s one of the only things that restores faith in humanity and the world- remembering and being able to find the truly good things. And in times of confusion, it’s a good for children to understand that when there is bad, there is just as much good surrounding us.

When something tragic happens on a larger scale, it can make our individual efforts feel almost insignificant. Who cares if I donated a pint of blood? What difference does my volunteer work make? No one person can save the whole world, but our individual efforts do add up. And when it comes down to it, the most important thing you can do is surround yourself with the people you love at home, because the world always needs more love: “What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family” (Mother Teresa).

THE COURAGE TO CHANGE

"You never cross the ocean unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore”

We’ve discussed how hard it can be to start new habits before. The other day, I was thinking to myself (and now to all of you), what about the opposite? What about quitting bad habits? When the day comes when you finally realize that a certain behavior is no longer serving its purpose in your life, it can be hard to let go. Sometimes, breaking an old habit can be harder than starting a new one! In the spirit of the season, think of this post as spring cleaning for the soul.

Why is it so hard to break a habit? Part of it is directly related to the brain and creating conditioned responses to situations. For instance, if something stressful happens and your reaction is to smoke a cigarette, that will eventually become your default setting. So, when you try to quit smoking and something stressful happens, you’re going to have a bit of a struggle fighting that knee-jerk reaction. When faced with this difficulty of breaking a conditioned response, many people waver. Another reason it can be hard to break an unhealthy habit is fear. Once we let go of this unhealthy habit, what’s on the other side? It may very well be health and happiness, but we don’t have any guarantee. We do, however, know what happens when we continue with our unhealthy behavior. It’s reliable. It’s helpful to remember, no matter how terrifying the unknown may seem, that there’s a an opportunity for a beautiful transformation on the other side. This little bit always gives me a surge of hope: “How does one become a butterfly?” “You must want to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar.”

Having an unhealthy habit doesn’t make you any less loveable or undeserving as anyone else. Just because you smoke or have a tendency to eat too much sweet food doesn’t make you a terrible person. If you approach habit-breaking from a place of self love rather than self loathing, it changes things. The following quote from Sally Hogshead is a great reminder to eliminate shame from your attitude about yourself/your habits: “The goal is not to change who you are, but to become more of who you are at your best”

To change requires a great deal of courage. It’s not easy to let go of something that has acted as a crutch or distraction, even if it’s detrimental to your well-being. It’ll be difficult at first, while you retrain yourself to find a new approaches to old situations, and you probably won’t get it right on the first try. Keep trying, because it’s never too late to start over: “I hope you live a life you're proud of and, if you're not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again” (F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button).

FOCUS ON THE JOURNEY, NOT THE DESTINATION

       "Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity, but in doing”- Greg Anderson.

As many of you know, this blog began as a way to share the personal journey of my family in overcoming adversity and appreciating the many blessings we have been given. It was also a way to open dialogue about my novel, “Flu Shot Gone Wrong.” In just one week, my story, “Flu Shot Gone Wrong,” will be published. It’s a long awaited time that has at last arrived. I’ve been dreading and anticipating it in equal measure. But why? Is it because I’m viewing publication as my “destination”? Or is it perhaps dread of the unknown, the “what happens next” of releasing a very personal story to millions of people?

The anticipation makes sense, after all- this is the result of years of work. Navigating the world of writing, finding the courage and strength to not only share our story but feel that I’ve done it justice, in between raising four children and maintaining faith has been hard work, but it was my calling. I have strong hopes that others will read our story and find the inspiration and strength within the pages to continue their own personal journeys. We never have to walk alone. In many ways, my anticipation is the equivalent of seeing the finish line after running a physically taxing race. The end is in sight, and I am eager to cross that line, taking some time to catch my breath and rest afterward.

The dread is a more difficult feeling to explain. Perhaps it is because all writing is a work that comes from within, it’s an opening of heart and soul. This particular bit of work exposes a huge piece of my own life, laying it bare for all to see. It’s opening up, and, as with any type of opening, it leaves an exposed, vulnerable place. Vulnerability, as Brene Brown says, “is about showing up and being seen. It’s tough to do that when we’re terrified about what people might see or think.” In writing my son’s story, I am opening our lives to the eyes of many: “This is real, this is me, this is us.” It is an invitation to exposure. In many ways, publishing is a gigantic leap of faith.

As March 10 draws ever closer, I try to push aside the dread, fear and anticipation, and remember instead that this is only one leg of a journey. The overarching theme in this particular journey is without a doubt love. When I remember that “Flu Shot Gone Wrong” began as an act of love for my children, all my strength returns. No matter what comes next in this journey of life, they will always be the most important part. It is their love and faith that keeps me afloat through the ups and downs. In fact, they gave me my voice. The truth is, in spite of the difficulties, I have experienced a vast amount of joy during this journey. Here’s to the ending of a chapter and the beginning of a new one!  www.flushotgonewrong.com https://m.facebook.com/flushotgonewrong www.wishforthesky.com        
                                                       
                                                         

Through Tragedy Comes Good

'Have mercy on me, my God, have mercy on me, for in you I take refuge. I will take refuge in the shadow of your wings until the disaster has passed." -- Psalm 57:1

   Our journey has definitely been like a roller coaster ride of sorts ---going uphill, downhill, and many twists and turns along the way. I often think of the song, 'Need You Now' by Plum:

                              "Standing on a road I didn't plan
                                  Wondering how I got to where I am
                              I'm trying to hear that still small voice
                                  I'm trying to hear above the noise

                               How many times have you heard me cry out
                                    "God please take this"?
                               How many times have you given me strength to
                                      Just keep breathing?
                                        Oh I need you
                               God, I need you now."

     The words in this song have often rang true for many of us. Whether standing on a road we didn't plan or completely blindsided by unforeseen circumstances, life can all too often leave us broken and bewildered.  During certain periods, when we find ourselves treading through the darkest moments, it's not always clear how to dust ourselves off and figure out how to rearrange the now shattered pieces. We know in this world bad things do happen to good people all too often, and when tragedy does strike, it knows no race, color, or creed. It is then we must dig down deep inside ourselves to a place we didn't even know existed and muster up every ounce of strength and courage. The many miracles and blessings witnessed along our own life changing passage has forever impacted me in so many ways and has shown the importance of staying in faith, especially in the moments it seemed pointless to do so!
     As we know from many stories in the Bible, sometimes the greatest things can come out after people have went through their hardest tribulations. Look at what happened when Moses was in the desert for forty years. When he finally was called out by God, he went on to successfully complete one of the greatest deliverance missions there is.
      As we all pass through our own floodwaters in life, finding refuge in Jesus is the key to being able to hold our head above water. We have to remember, no matter how tremendous the pain and grief might be, we are still in control of our reactions in those trying times. You may ask yourself, as I did so many times before, "How can I keep going?", "Is there really a light at the end of this tunnel?" These questions can be very perplexing, especially when the tunnel seems never ending. I believe the answers lie in our ability to stay in faith through all of the agony and tears. When it feels as if we can't give anymore and have reached our wit's end, God reveals a way for us to reach the light.
      I knew my son, Maurice's, life was meant to touch others. I hoped his story would one day make a difference in people's lives. Over the years, in the midst of the greatest obstacles/adversities of my life, I prayed for God to show me the best ways to accomplish this.
      I felt God laid it on my heart to start a nonprofit organization that would grant wishes to brain injured children and also to write the book about my son's story. The Maurice Lamkin Jr. Brain Injury Foundation was soon founded www.wishforthesky.com and I then worked diligently to complete, 'Flu Shot Gone Wrong,' an unvarnished account of how my son's life was transformed perpetually after receiving the vaccine and the love, faith, miracles, and countless lessons learned along the way www.flushotgonewrong.com ! At first, I wasn't sure I'd be able to convey the right words or even have enough energy to complete such a task. I thought to myself, How can I do this with no formal writing training ?--- I'm just A Mom ---
      A Mom who finds pleasures in the simpler things of life---that first cool sip of iced tea, gazing wondrously at a rainbow, and tucking the kids into bed at night.
     A Mom who would give anything for her children and never expect to travel down such a tortuous road.
     A Mom guided by God and on a mission to help her fellow mankind and have the story of my precious son heard.
      I soon realized that the book was one of the ways God would use to reach out to people, so for the next year and a half, I worked assiduously at it. Every word I've written has been like reliving our journey all over again. I am still amazed with God's astounding goodness, and He has opened my eyes even more through my writings.
      I am very excited to announce that the official release date for 'Flu Shot Gone Wrong' is March 10, 2015. You can now order copies and e Book download cards on the Tate Publishing website at: https://www.tatepublishing.com/bookstore/book.php?w=9781633671256 ! My hopes are for people to become more informed when deciding whether the flu shot is right for their child or loved one, and will also benefit from our experience. It is my prayer that Maurice's story will inspire you to never give up and to know, no matter what trials may come against you, God loves you and will never leave your side! God has promised us beauty for our ashes and wants us to lean on Him in our greatest times of suffering. We must always remember that when you stay in faith, God turns tragedy into good.
   "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives." Genesis 50:20
     
                                           

Breaking Free From Anxiety: How I Overcame My Inner Turmoil And Ways Of Conquering Your Own Internal Mayhem!

  "You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, and how you can still come out of it."--Maya Angelou---

     Anxiety, also known as the fight-or-flight response, is our bodies way of showing us that something within our current situation needs to change. It is the most common mental illness in the United States, and is all too often accompanied by depression, another familiar condition bewildering millions. Our ancestors used this same fight-or-flight response to their advantage, utilizing their careful thinking and problem solving skills in becoming well prepared for winter and warding off unwanted animal attacks. While it is normal for everyone to experience occasional anxiety, when more recurrent bouts of unwelcome, intense feelings rear their ugly head, it can be a sign of anxiety disorder. Panic attacks, obsessive compulsive disorders, nervous behaviors, social anxiety disorders, and a wide range of phobias are some of the most frequent symptoms exhibited when people suffer from this crippling affliction. While doctor's are still unsure of the exact cause of anxiety; stress, genetics, and traumatic life events seem to be highest on the list of contributing factors, reported by those who suffer with them. When sudden unexpected events occur, such as: loss of a loved one, a failed relationship, a traumatic life event, sickness, or bad business deal, we are often left confused and brokenhearted, with our feelings meandering wildly.
     The torment that comes along with generalized anxiety and panic attacks is a topic very close to my heart, as not too long ago, I struggled day and night with unsettling feelings of fear, despair, trepidation...and the list went on and on. I found myself trapped in misery, as I agonized incessantly, desperately searching for a solution to the growing turmoil inside me. In this post, I will focus on my own battle with these fits of terror and methods used to overcome them for good!
      My battle with disquietude started when my son, Maurice, was first hospitalized. Our entire world was turned upside down and everything I knew no longer made sense. My first born, lied in the ICU, on Life Support, fighting for his life and I was thrust into an emotional, mental, and physical state which was unfamiliar, to say the least. I was focused on being the best mother I could be for Maurice and my other children, and didn't have time nor the energy to worry about my worsening apprehension. The ups and downs encountered throughout the ICU, Rehab., Life coming home from Rehab., and the journey we embarked on from that point forward were the most perplexing and trying times of my life, but I was determined to stay in faith, finding a way for the shattered pieces to all fit again. I knew I couldn't let my perturbation get the best of me, but over the years, despite diligently working to get a handle on it, the symptoms got harder to control. A war was going on inside myself, and I was trying with all my might to not let it prevail. It never affected my ability to take care of the children, but it was definitely impacting my life on a continual basis.
       The restless nights were the worse. I would excessively worry about the future and Maurice getting better. I went days without being able to sleep. The worry turned into unrelenting fear, which plagued my mind. I was incessantly scared my other children would get hurt or something might happen to me. I felt as if I had no control over anything and was completely powerless.
      I can't even recall the number of times I called my grandma or aunt when having a panic attack. I would wake up sweating and breathing sporadically, feeling as though my heart was going to pound through my chest. They would talk me through it, and then I would toss and turn for hours, trying to get back to sleep.
      On several occasions, I called the nurses in the E.R. in the middle of the night, fearing something was wrong with me. Sometimes, it felt as if my entire left side would go completely numb. Convinced I was having a heart attack, my aunt would come drive me to the hospital while my dad watched the kids. They would perform many tests and always had the same diagnosis of stress and anxiety.
     I'd ask God to please take my fear away. I didn't want to live like this and was petrified my mind was spiraling out of control. I'd sit and cry while everyone was asleep, knowing I had to get control over my thoughts. Even though my dad and aunts knew what was going on, I had never actually talked about my feelings in depth with them. I chose to finally open up.
     My dad wanted me to be strong and tried his best to build me up. He assured me I could handle anything and that exercise was key to taking my mind off of everything. The last thing I felt like doing at that time, though, was working out. My aunts urged me to see a doctor and felt maybe anxiety medication was the best option. I greatly appreciated their opinions, but considering the reaction my baby had to the Flu Shot, I wasn't a big fan of medications and opted to work on it myself.
      I prayed for God to let me live without the unsettling worries, implemented breathing techniques, a little bit of exercise, positive thinking, and actually put myself in 'uncomfortable situations' at times, just so I could see that everything would be okay and my fears wouldn't come true. I also started a journal, writing down my inner most thoughts and goals for the future. The symptoms fluctuated---decreasing for a few months, returning, and then diminishing again.
     I held fast that God would turn things around. After all, He knows us inside and out and could conquer anything. I laid at night reciting Psalms 139:1-3 (NIV) "O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise, you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways."
     Ultimately, I had to work very hard to control the debilitating effects of my anxiety. Although the previous methods I implemented were a great start, it wasn't until I completely gave all my worries and trust over to God, that I experienced total relief, peace and comfort from my symptoms. I knew I must rise out of my own ashes and get my enthusiasm for life back. Even though my son was now permanently disabled and so much around me had changed, there was still so much beauty, lessons, miracles, and happiness to be seen and discovered...but I was blind to them until I trusted in God wholeheartedly! One of the lessons I have been taught through our plight is God will always protect us. He hates to see his children hurting, and when you stay in faith, He will deliver you from your burdens.
      It's easy to go through life living in our disappointments, set backs, and regrets...but when we stay focused on the past, we can't fulfill God's plan for our future! We are stronger than we think and must use the adversity in our life to help others. God would have never allowed the obstacles to come in our lives, if He didn't have a plan to bring us out victorious, better, and happier than ever before! If you stay in faith during your times of greatest suffering, God will take those fears that once controlled you and turn them into part of your testimony to thrust others out of their darkest hours! Thank you for reading this very special post and I will close with a quote from the well known Swiss- American psychiatrist, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross: "The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen."
    

The Most Precious Gift

 "Therefore the Lord himself shall give you a sign; Behold, a virgin shall conceive, and bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel" Isaiah 7:14 (KJV)

          As we celebrate the birth of our Lord, Jesus Christ, it can be somewhat difficult to find peace with so much suffering going on around the world. Mark 13:7 (KJV) reads as follows: 'And when ye shall hear of wars and rumors of wars, be ye not troubled: for such things must be; but the end shall not be yet.' We must remember that God came to Earth as a man to show us love, peace, endless mercy, and that He wants us to find comfort and peace right where we are at.
         While my kids and I visited a live nativity scene this morning, I couldn't help think about Jesus' mother, Mary. Already very large and almost ready to give birth, what were her feelings as she embarked on the journey to Bethlehem? Any mother-to-be can experience a long list of anxious emotions, and I can't imagine the thoughts going through her mind as the innkeeper said ' there was no room in the inn to give birth?' Luke 2:7 says: and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.' I know she was overjoyed at the sight of the precious baby she had given birth to...and elated her son would grow up to save mankind from their sins. She of course would give Him the name Jesus, which means 'Savior.'
          I strive to teach my children the true meaning of Christmas. I want them to know it isn't about how many presents you get or the number of holiday functions one might attend, but instead, about joy, giving, and making sacrifices for others. We should all aim to keep the Christmas spirit year round, always reflecting how God has already given us the greatest gift we can ever receive, in his son, Jesus. The religious leader and author, Thomas Monson, said it best when he wrote: 'Christmas is the spirit of giving without a thought of getting. It is happiness because we see joy in people. It is forgetting self and finding time for others. It is discarding the meaningless and stressing the true values.'
         Merry Christmas from our family to yours! I hope everyone had a wonderful day, filled with memories which will last a lifetime!

                                                     

        
       
       

A Present Day Miracle

     "So Jesus said to him, "unless you see signs and wonders you will not believe." John 4:48 ESV

      We all know that Jesus raised people from the dead, healed the sick, and performed countless other divine miracles. Have you ever thought: If only Jesus were still walking the Earth right now...then it would be all too easy for the suffering to be healed of their afflictions? I know that I have. Just a touch of His hand, reaching out for the edge of His garment, or a merciful prayer from His holiness brought about divine healing in that time. But what about 'Present Day' Miracles...Do they still exist? Some people are skeptic, not believing in healings and Present Day Miracles. They pray and pray...but feel there is no answer. The truth of the matter is that when we are in the midst of extreme circumstances, it is normal for us to want God to answer our prayers immediately. The reality is, however, our answer doesn't always come in the timeframe or manner we would like or expect. When we stay in faith, no matter how long it might take, God sees our pain and will bring us through what we are facing.
       I would like to share with you my own 'Present Day Miracle'. My story starts about a year after my firstborn son, Maurice, became permanently disabled from taking the Flu Shot. This was a very scary time. Every aspect of life as we knew it had been completely altered. Having witnessed my baby battling to survive forty days and nights on Life Support, then transferring to Rehab. where grueling therapy sessions began to walk again and regain all lost abilities, and finally 'Coming Home,' where I was completely focused on being the best mom for Maurice with his ever changing special needs, my inquisitive toddler, and my sweet infant girl.....To say the least, I was physically and mentally drained. From sunrise to sunset, I was so busy taking care of Maurice and my other two little ones. Money was also very scarce... I would constantly worry about how I was going to provide for my little ones. Saying we were struggling to make ends meet was definitely an understatement. At night, I would collapse into bed, praying the morning would bring a brighter day. The only thing keeping me going was the love for my children and my deepening spiritual relationship with God. I knew He was with us and could see all of our heartache and struggles.
      In the first few chapters of my soon to be released book, I tell how one night while Maurice lie in the Intensive Care Unit on Life Support...me, my dad, and Maurice's kindergarten teacher drove to see a faith healer, named Alan Ames, who was in town. I had never done or experienced anything like that before...and at the time wasn't even sure if I believed in faith healers....but was willing and desperate to save Maurice's life! We had an amazing experience that night and I vowed to go back every year to see the faith healer when he came to town. Since Maurice wasn't able to physically go the first year, I was greatly anticipating our next return the following year.....which is where my Present Day Miracle would take place.
      A few weeks before the healing service, I was feeling very overwhelmed. I had been trying my best to deal with everything and be brave in front of my children, but inside I was utterly terrified. I would stand at the kitchen window, which overlooked a tree in the backyard. Tears would stream down my face, as I watched a tiny bird hopping from one tree limb to another. As crazy as it might sound, I hoped this was a sign...possibly a message from God letting me know everything was going to be alright. I started praying, "Please, God. I don't know if I'm supposed to ask for such a thing, but if possible, can you please show me some kind of sign when we go see Mr. Ames? Just something to let me know you see what we're going through and everything with Maurice will be okay." I repeated this same prayer everyday in the weeks leading up to the healing service.
     The day of the service, I got Maurice dressed in his best clothes. He had been having a few seizures that morning, and my other little ones were coming down with a cold. When we were leaving the house, Maurice soiled his new jeans. I couldn't help but think something was trying to keep us from going, as I changed him into a different outfit. This only made me more determined though....
     We were just a few blocks away from the church. We were following a line of cars, I just knew were going to our same destination. This was a different church than we had seen Mr. Ames at the first time. As we turned into the parking lot, I was amazed at how big it was. It was a beautiful Catholic church named Our Lady of Lourdes Grotto.
     We pulled into a parking spot and unloaded the trunk. We put Maurice into his wheelchair and situated the girls inside their double stroller. There must have been hundreds of people there, and just being amongst them felt very tranquil.
     After Mass had ended, Mr. Ames came out and started speaking. We found a seat and listened to him reveal the innermost details of his own personal transformation. It was like I was glued to my seat and my ears fixated upon his every word as he continued speaking about the many documented healings, which had taken place at these services.
     His testimony was now coming to an end, and the healing service was ready to begin. I felt shivers going through my body as we lined up. I could see Mr. Ames laying his hands upon each person, and tears engulfed my face.
    Please, God, will you show me a sign that you see what's going on with Maurice? I prayed.
    I pushed Maurice up to the front and stood behind him. We were kind of in the middle, so it would take Mr. Ames a few minutes longer before getting to us. I glanced over at my dad, and we smiled at each other.
    When Mr. Ames got to us, I looked up at him; my face bright red from crying and whispered, "Please help us." He seemed to see right through to my heart and started praying over each one of us. I couldn't help but think about the sign from God I had been praying for. Please God, please show me a sign, I repeated in my mind.
     Mr. Ames had just finished praying over my dad, who was last in our row, and was starting to move toward the next family. We were getting ready to walk away when suddenly... Mr. Ames stopped. He quickly turned around, making his way back over to me. "I need to tell you that God does see you and sees what you're going through. Everything will be alright. I felt this was laid on my heart just now, and I had to tell you."
    He touched my and Maurice's forehead one last time, before moving on to the next family. Tears ran down my face...I couldn't believe He had answered my prayers in that way!!
   On the ride home, I told my dad all about what I had prayed in the previous weeks and he was amazed! I vowed to always share this story with people to let them know God is definitely real and sees everything we are going through. Things were really hard, but I would continue taking refuge in God.
   We now go back to see Mr. Ames each year. His website is www.alanames.org ---- Now you see why I will never doubt Present Day Miracles. Thank you for letting me share this special story with you. I will end this blog post with Jeremiah 29:12-13: "Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart."

                                            

    
    

Overcoming Tragedy: A Mother's Fight To Save Her Son And Divine Lessons Learned Along The Way!!!

       "In times of great stress or adversity, it's always best to keep busy, to plow your anger and your energy into something positive"...Lee lacocca


     Hello and Happy Tuesday to all! Please allow me to introduce myself. My name is Michelle Mouille....a mother to four beautiful children --- Maurice my fifteen year old angel, Malik my twelve year old basketball wiz, Mariah my ten year old pop princess, and Malani my nine year old vivacious gymnast--- I am president/founder of the Maurice Lamkin Jr. Brain Injury Foundation that grants wishes to brain injured children, and a new author.
     I have just completed a book, which is about to be published titled "Flu Shot Gone Wrong," where I give an unvarnished account of the most tragic and personal battle my family has ever known...and Overcome! There was no way of knowing that after my son received what seemed to be a simple vaccine at the tender age of five, our lives would be completely shattered and we would find ourselves tested in every way imaginable. My worst fears were coming to pass right before my eyes...my first born would have to battle through forty days and nights on Life Support, a sea of surgeries, hospital stays and developmental set backs...but relentless faith would prove to surmount all!!!That's the thing about tragedy and adversity...it can blindside us, trying to make sure we will never be able to get back up again. I have learned that our darkest hours are sometimes what brings about the greatest inspiration, hope, strength, faith, and love. The key is discovering how to make it through our tribulations, without letting them overtake us. I will talk more about the book and my son's story in future blog posts, exploring these questions and more in great detail. I believe the parable of the farmer who owned an old mule is a perfect example of overcoming adversity. The story tells that the mule fell into the farmer's well. The farmer heard the mule making noises. The farmer sympathized with the mule, but decided not to try and save him. Instead, he called his neighbors together and told them what had happened...and enlisted them to help haul dirt to bury the old mule in the well and put him out of his misery. Initially, the old mule was hysterical! But as the farmer and his neighbors continued shoveling and the dirt hit his back...a thought struck him! It suddenly dawned on him that every time a shovel load of dirt landed on his back, he should shake it off and step up! This he did, blow after blow. No matter how painful the blows, the old mule fought through 'panic' and just kept shaking it off! It wasn't long before the old mule, battered and bruised, stepped triumphantly over the wall of that well! What seemed like it would bury him, actually blessed him....all because of the manner in which he handled his adversity. I have found this to be very true in my own plight as well. The old saying "God never gives you more than you can handle" often rang in my ears as I found myself crying, curled up in a ball. Through the darkest hours, though, I came to see God's strength and peace at work!
      I am new to the world of blogging, so please bear with me while I figure out the specifics of "maintaining a proper blog." Rather than trying to conform my blog around the way I see others designing theirs...I will just promise to be sincere and try to use every post to reach, inform, and empower the lives of others.
      As mother's we all love our children, wanting them to be happy and healthy. We often put our own needs/wants to the side in order to make these goals realities. There's nothing we wouldn't do to keep them safe....but sometimes this great, unpredictable, yet beautiful mystery we call 'Life,' sends us a curve ball... which is exactly what happened to me and my family. It can somehow feel as if we are being tested in this life. I know I have felt this way many times before. Have you ever felt as if God is watching to see how you would handle a certain situation? I know that I have. I will be using this page to blog not only about the upcoming book and my son's story, but also as a means of letting out my innermost feelings on all kinds of topics that I feel will be helpful, such as: selfless acts of love, giving, trusting God, igniting our faith, relaxation techniques, living with fibroids, life after brain injury, holding on to your inner child, vaccine reform, finding our own 'super nanny' within ourselves, 'comfort foods', overcoming anxiety....and many many more. I believe God has equipped each of us, in our own special way to inspire and help our fellow mankind, and that's what I pray my blogs to accomplish. I welcome and will greatly appreciate any feedback, questions, or comments you might have on any blog posts or just our plight in general. I would love to hear any of your own inspiring stories or how you overcame a tragic situation.
        William Shakespeare said it best with his quote: "Sweet are the uses of adversity, Which like the toad, ugly and venomous, Wears yet a precious jewel in his head." I would like to share with you a couple of inspiring stories from well known people in history. Sir Winston Churchill had a speech impediment when he was a young boy and it took him three years to complete the eighth grade. He overcame all of that and became the British prime minister and recipient of the Nobel Prize for literature in 1953. Walt Disney also had his own share of tribulations to overcome. He had a great business idea when he was young, but found himself with no funding to start his business. He approached many banks for loans but they all turned him down. He didn't let that stop him and after visiting hundreds of banks finally found one to give him a start up loan. The well known Disney parks and brands were then brought into our lives. Adversity seems to strike all of us in this world. And when it does it knows no race, creed, or boundaries. We must dig down deep inside to a place we didn't even know existed, and muster up every amount of courage, faith, and strength possible. It is then, through our ignited faith in these darkest moments we will come to see our spiritual, physical, and mental being awaken and flourish like never before. I have seen so many miracles and learned so many divine lessons, along our own journey that I will share with you in future blogs.  These are miracles and lessons which wouldn't have been possible without our 'detour' and we have definitely grown in every way possible through our journey and trust that God always has a plan, even in the midst of tremendous suffering. I will close this blog with two Bible scriptures that have always soothed me in my roughest hours. "They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out it's roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit" Jeremiah 17:8 (NIV) ...This last scripture is very touching to me and I believe in wholeheartedly: "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives" Genesis 50:20